Dear Today Show,
To borrow a phrase from our friend Stephen Colbert, you are officially On Notice. From that baby that you claim knows how to read, to Laura Schlessinger talking about women driving their husbands to cheat, to asking Jim Cramer, a FINANCIAL expert, about his friendship with Elliot Spitzer, your segments this week have been even more grating than usual. It’s bad enough that I have to watch Meredith Vieira forget that she’s now on a more “legitimate” morning show than The View (please, let’s not get me started on Elisabeth Hasselbeck), but now I have to watch this baby, who is really more “local news” material (I need to see some corroborating studies, please!), too? I love babies and all, and do think that infidelity is wrong, and can understand that we might want to know, in an inappropriate and slightly voyeuristic way, what Jim Cramer thinks of what his friend did, but I have a sense of decorum. Today Show, I love your dramatic opening music, and I love that my DVR allows me to start you a little late, so I can watch your longest (and most actual-news-related) segment before I leave for work in the morning. But if you continue in this manner, and if I have to look at Drew Peterson’s ugly, young-wife-killing mug one (or a couple) more time(s), I’m going to be forced to listen to Morning Edition instead. Don’t make me be more of a yuppie than I already am, mmkay?